Lights and Shadows (Oregon In Love) Read online

  “So how’s the celebrity holding up among all his admirers?” she said, touching his arm.

  Marc offered a ghost of a smile in response. “How are you doing?”

  “I’m having a wonderful time,” she said.

  Marc’s expression darkened. He looked away from her. Julia felt bereft. Did I say something wrong? She clutched her evening bag and put all her energy into socializing, all the while ignoring a strange ache in her chest.

  ***

  The party broke up after midnight. Marc led Julia back to his pickup without speaking. As he began the long drive back to Buell Creek, his frustration mounted. He didn’t know what to say.

  He didn’t know how to act. All he knew was he had met the first woman who’d completely captivated him, and she was more or less unavailable.

  He felt a profound sense of relief when they finally reached the B & B. He parked the Toyota and went around to Julia’s side. She slid out of the seat. Together they walked to the door of the cottage. The only light came from the front porch of the main house.

  Julia turned and looked up at him. “Thank you, Marc, for allowing me to be a part of your special evening.”

  He stared down at her, wishing this night could end differently. When she tilted up her chin and smiled, he was sorely tempted to kiss her in spite of his prior intentions. Before making a fool of himself, he murmured a few parting words, and left.

  Chapter Seven

  Julia gave up trying to figure out Marc Dorin’s mercurial mood changes. At first, she’d been hurt by his abrupt coolness after the book party. On further reflection, she reminded herself she had no business contemplating a romance when she only planned to stay in Oregon for a few months. Which meant renewing her campaign to assist Sara in running the B & B.

  Rebuffing her sister-in-law’s arguments, Julia began preparing and serving breakfast in the mornings when guests were present. She enjoyed the busyness and visiting with the people who came to stay, not to mention their appreciation of her culinary skills.

  What really improved her outlook was the knowledge that she’d soon be in familiar territory. By helping Sara and starting a new consulting project, she could have the best of both worlds—and avoid any guilt in the process.

  Julia thought back to the book party where she’d met the man who worked in the administration of a nearby college. That he’d specifically sought her out, combined with her chronic restlessness, made her sure their mutual introduction had been by divine appointment. Things were dovetailing too perfectly to think otherwise.

  Over the last month, between cooking and cleaning, she’d been working the phones. It had taken some managemental gymnastics, but a plan had been set into motion, and Julia couldn’t wait to make the announcement to Brian and Sara. She knew they might be surprised by her plans so she decided to make another special dinner for them, hoping to put them in a receiving mood for the news.

  On an evening when there were no guests expected, Julia outdid herself in her dinner preparations. During the meal, she could hardly contain her excitement, but she wanted to wait for just the right moment to speak. Her enthusiasm nearly eclipsed her weariness. But she felt certain once she was involved in a meaningful project, any remaining fatigue would be banished for good.

  Over dessert, she pushed a small portion of flan around on her plate, waiting until Brian and Sara were finished eating.

  “That was incredible,” Sara said at last, dabbing her mouth with a napkin.

  “I’ll second that,” Brian said, pinning Julia with a knowing look. “But for some reason I get the feeling my dear sister is buttering us up for something.” He sat back in his chair and surveyed her with his brow lifted. “So what’s up, sis? You’ve been looking smug all evening.”

  Sara leaned forward, joining in her husband’s curiosity. “Is it something about Marc?”

  Julia's smile gave way to a frown for a moment. “Of course not.”

  “Oops, sorry,” Sara said, obviously chagrined.

  “But, there is something special I want to tell you about. Something very exciting.” She took a deep breath. “At Marc’s book party last month, I met a man named Spencer Meyers who is in administration overseeing Northwest Community College. During our conversation, we realized we had a mutual acquaintance. My boss at the San Diego firm!”

  Sara’s mouth opened then closed. Brian grimaced.

  “Spencer mentioned that the school was considering professional consultation to determine the reasons for decreasing levels of enrollment. Of course, I mentioned that I was in consulting and,” she paused dramatically, “I have been invited to submit a proposal to the college!”

  Silence reigned for the space of several heartbeats. Sara put her napkin on the table, her brow wrinkled. “I thought you were on sabbatical.”

  Julia shifted in her seat. “I am, but this really just fell into my lap. And the best part is that I still get to stay here with you and help out, especially when the baby comes—”

  Brian stood suddenly and looked down at her. “What Sara means, Julia, is that you are supposed to be recovering from an accident that you neglected to recover from before. And what’s this about being invited? It sounds to me like you hustled it from beginning to end.”

  Julia shot a limpid look at her fulminating brother. “Apparently I was wrong to expect congratulations from you.”

  “And what would I congratulate you on? Your foolishness?”

  She got to her feet. “That’s uncalled for!”

  Sara, darting nervous glances between the two, stood and left the room.

  “I disagree,” Brian said. “That ridiculously short break you took after your head injury was a joke, and is obviously responsible for your current lack of judgment!”

  Julia crossed her arms over her chest. “Your show of support is appreciated.”

  “I support wisdom, and wisdom says you still need to rest!”

  “You’re certainly entitled to your opinion but let me remind you that I’m quite capable of running my own life.”

  Brian placed his hands on the table and leaned towards her. “Look me in the eye and tell me you feel completely well.”

  “If anything is making me sick,” she said evenly, “it’s living in limbo like this.”

  “So you admit you’ve been feeling sick.”

  “I’ve made my plans.”

  “You’re going to call your boss and tell him you’re not taking the assignment. Or I will.”

  Julia lifted her chin. “You wouldn’t dare.”

  “You might be a make up artist and able to fool others, but I can tell you’re on the brink of exhaustion.”

  “I’m sorry you can’t be happy for me. But it’s my decision and I’ve decided to take on the project should they accept the proposal.”

  “Stop being stubborn and stupid,” he grated.

  Julia’s eyes burned with unshed tears. What she was being was foolish to assume Brian might be glad for her. She grabbed dishes off the table. In the kitchen, she set them down onto the counter with a clatter. Brian followed with more dishes and began to load the dishwasher. With her back to him, Julia cleaned off the countertop, trying to ignore the waves of disapproval emanating from him.

  After Brian turned on the dishwasher, she could feel him watching her. She refused to look at him. Finally, with a noise of disgust, he stalked from the room.

  Julia sagged against the counter and swiped at the hot tears escaping down her cheeks. Feelings of failure and sadness washed over her. Brian had no idea how much she desired his approval. His categorical displeasure tonight drained away her joy, replacing it with fear that she’d possibly alienated the one person, aside from her father, she loved most in the world.

  But what else can I do? Wait around to some paper-thin hope of restored health? When does that glorious day occur? At least if I'm busy I won't have time to mope.

  The blood in her head pounded with the rhythm of the dishwasher cycle. Julia closed her ey
es, pressing a hand to the bridge of her nose. Tomorrow she would contact her boss in San Diego and firm up the details of the project.

  ***

  The next morning, Julia admitted to being a coward while she waited for Brian to leave for work before going to the main house. Actually, she would’ve avoided going altogether if it wasn’t for the driving force of sheer boredom. At least at the house, there were always things to clean.

  As for seeing her brother face to face, she just wasn’t up to it yet. Their argument was still fresh in her mind, coupled with the knowledge she was a disappointment to him. The stress had affected her physically as well. First thing this morning, she’d thrown up into the toilet. Not the most promising start to the day.

  All was quiet when she entered the house. Relieved at not having to make chit-chat, Julia helped herself to a cup of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table. Cupping her chin in her hand, she fixed a blank stare at the opposite wall while her brain went a million miles an hour.

  “Good morning, Julia.”

  Julia started. She mustered a passable smile while Sara busied herself around the kitchen.

  “How’s the coffee? Brian usually makes it too strong for my taste.”

  She glanced down at her cup and realized she’d forgotten to drink it. “Uh, I’ll let you know in a minute.”

  “That good, huh?” Sara said, joining her at the table with a mug in her hand. “How are you doing today?”

  Julia heard the concern in her sister-in-law’s voice. She knew there’d be no avoiding this conversation. She shrugged. “All right, I guess. How’s Brian? Still steaming from the ears?”

  Sara smiled. “No. He did fuss and fume for a while, but he cooled down pretty soon after that.” She took a sip from her mug. “He had hoped to see you this morning because he has something he wants to give you.”

  “What, a knuckle sandwich?”

  Laughing, Sara shook her head. “No, but I did wonder if it would come to blows last night.” She scooted from her chair. “I’ll go get it right now.”

  Julia’s fertile imagination came up with several cynical ideas, but when Sara returned to the room, her heart tightened in her chest. Sara set a laptop computer in its carrying case on the table. “He just bought a different model but he assures me this is fast and powerful enough even for you.”

  Blinking away the moisture from her eyes, Julia wondered if he’d come around to her way of thinking. No, that was unrealistic. It appeared he’d just resigned himself to the reality that she would take the job.

  Whatever the reasons, the computer was an olive branch. And a huge help, since she didn’t bring her own up from California. Pig-headed male he could be on occasion, he was still the best brother a sister could have. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she ran her hand along the edge of the nylon case. Her fingers itched to open it and start at the keys. She’d do that later when alone.

  She looked up at Sara. “Did you talk him into this?”

  “No. He came up with the idea on his own. He also has arranged for a maid service to take over the cleaning and for delivery of breakfast items from a local pastry shop to begin tomorrow. Isn’t he such a sweetie?”

  Julia smiled at the dewy expression in Sara’s eyes.

  “But why are you taking the job if you’re still recovering from the accident?”

  “I feel I am recovered,” said Julia. Then she remembered the crying jag Sara had recently witnessed. “At least I’m almost there.”

  If her sister-in-law was unconvinced, she didn’t say so, and after a few more minutes of small talk, Julia picked up the case and returned to the cottage.

  She set the computer on the table and powered it up. While her hands flew over the keys as she familiarized herself with the unit, Julia thought back to the accident that was at the crux of her and Brian’s disagreement. She’d been late for work and had hydroplaned in a downpour. Without her seatbelt and airbag, she would’ve most likely died at the scene. Instead, she’d ended up in the hospital with head injuries.

  Julia decided the whole coma thing was just a dramatic way of saying she’d been unconscious for awhile. She had no memory of those days and preferred it that way. In her opinion, it had been God’s graciousness and the power of prayer that sped her recovery. She’d gone back to work before anyone expected it.

  Of course she hadn’t been able to return to the office for a couple of weeks—her face had been too black and blue. Julia had files sent over from the office so she could stay on top of her projects, even though those projects had been reassigned to others.

  It was so easy for everyone to tell her to relax and get rest. The time in the hospital after waking up had tried her sanity. As soon as her face healed, she was back down at the firm, unable to stand one more day of being home alone. Then came the depression. When she recognized signs of that malady, she plunged back into work, confident she could escape its clutches.

  For the most part she had. As long as she stayed busy, Julia felt safe, secure, and needed. That she’d entered the consulting profession had been no accident. She loved being able to come into a situation and find ways of improving it. She loved the challenge of solving problems.

  Her brother Brian was a workaholic, although he was trying to cut back now that he had a family. But since he was a man, his drive to succeed was affirmed. The same trait was viewed negatively in a woman. Well, I don't have a husband or children, and I'm not inclined to sit around and wait for someone to take care of me.

  She sighed and thought of Marc. It had been quite a while since she’d seen him. Did he ever think of her? Doubtful, she decided. That was one more reason to be thankful for this job opportunity. Why sit around and become spoony over some guy when there was work to be done! This consulting opportunity was from the Lord. There were too many coincidences for her to believe otherwise. Now that she had a direction for her life, she prayed God would sustain her through to the end—and keep the awful headaches at bay.

  Julia closed her eyes for a moment. Her hands stilled over the keys. Maybe after this assignment, she really would take a rest. A vacation in some tropical location. Perhaps if she mentioned that to Brian, it would ease some of the tension between them. She wanted very much to see his smile again. His scowls were unpleasant to say the least.

  Chapter Eight

  Marc pulled into the driveway of the bed and breakfast and turned off the engine. While unloading his camera equipment, he reminded himself the reason he’d come was not to see Julia.

  Staying the night would give him a jumpstart on the drive up to the mountains in the morning. He hadn’t seen Sara and Brian since the party, and an evening in their company would be nice after a busy work week.

  And he was tired. Mentally exhausted. Not thinking of Julia for all this time had been very difficult. He needed a chance to relax with friends. He walked onto the porch and decided to knock rather than just head in. If Julia happened to be present, he would nod politely in her direction and continue to keep his thoughts on a tight leash.

  She answered the door and gave him a warm smile of welcome. Easier said than done.

  “Marc! Come in.”

  “Julia.” That was all he could manage as he bumped his way in the door with his bags.

  Brian walked past Julia and shook Marc’s hand, asking him how things were going. While Marc made his replies he noticed Julia returning to the living room.

  “Take your pick of rooms and when you’re settled in, join us for coffee,” Brian said.

  Marc nodded and headed upstairs. He chose the room he always stayed in when it was available. It was the smallest of the four, but he liked the cozy feel. The soft green walls, stained glass lamp, and handmade quilt on the bed lent an air of welcome. The light filtering through the curtains and the breeze lifting the fronds of the potted ferns made him feel at peace after the noise and bustle of city life.

  Marc unpacked and checked his reflection in the mirror, all at once remembering his auspici
ous first meeting with Julia Wilcox. No lipstick this time. Biting back a smile, he went back downstairs and into the living room.

  “Marc! Julia told me you’d arrived,” said Sara from where she lay stretched out on the couch. “Can I get you anything?”

  Marc shook his head and wondered where he was going to sit. Brian handed him a mug of coffee and returned to his seat in a brown wicker chair. That only left the loveseat, half of which was occupied by Julia. Marc suppressed a sigh and perched on the edge next to her.

  “How are you feeling, Sara?” he asked after taking a sip of coffee.

  “Exhausted, although I don’t do anything around here anymore. Julia goes on as if she owns the place.” She sent a rueful smile at her sister-in-law.

  Brian made a noise that sounded remarkably like a grunt. Marc glanced between the siblings and wondered if he sensed tension in the air, then decided he had no interest in what the problem was.

  Julia turned to him. “I saw you bring in your camera equipment. Does that mean you’re going on a photo shoot?”

  It had been a while since those bright eyes of hers had been fastened on him in that unsettling way. Marc resisted the urge to tug at his collar.

  “Uh, yes. Tomorrow morning I’m heading up to the Deschutes River near Mt. Hood to do some hiking and take some pictures.”

  “How fascinating.”

  Sara yawned. “Didn’t you mention last time you were going to be teaching a class up there as well?”

  “Saturday afternoon I’m doing a photography class for a local 4-H group in the town of Maupin.

  I’ll do most of my own work on Sunday.”

  “Is that far from here?” asked Julia.

  “About a two hour drive.”

  “It sounds like fun,” she said.

  He shrugged. “I enjoy it.”

  “What kind of pictures are you going to take?”

  “I’m doing an article on the Deschutes for an outdoor magazine so I need to get some shots of the river and the flora and fauna. The basics.”