Dearly Loved Read online

  ***

  An hour later, Meredith perched on the edge of the couch, waiting for the inevitable ring of the doorbell. On the phone, Mr. Roberts had correctly identified Bitsy’s age and told her about a heart-shaped birthmark on his tummy.

  Bitsy, squeaky clean from a bath, stretched himself across her lap, giving her full access to that birthmark. Meredith absently rubbed his belly, trying to remember if she’d gathered all his things. She didn’t want any reminder of him left behind. Besides, she worried it might be unnatural to be so attached to an animal. Perhaps his absence would force her to develop more than nodding acquaintances with people.

  She’d only been attending church haphazardly. Sunday mornings were difficult, due to fatigue. Since she never really caught up on her sleep for the remainder of the week, she found herself nodding off during the mid-week services.

  The sound of the doorbell made Meredith jump. Bitsy dove off her lap and danced around the door, yapping wildly. When she opened the door, she found a dark-haired man wearing wire-framed glasses and an outfit looking like it came straight from The Gap. Beyond him she could see a white Mercedes parked behind her Saturn.

  The man smiled and held out his hand. “I’m Clayton Roberts. You must be Ms. Ambrose.”

  She shook his hand, noticing he had beautiful hazel eyes. She invited him inside her living room.

  When Clayton saw Bitsy, he hunched down and held out his hand. “Do you remember me, Snowflake?” He glanced up at Meredith with a grin. “My daughter picked the name.”

  Bitsy approached him and gave his hand a cautious sniff. When he licked his hand a bit, Clayton picked him up. Bitsy seemed content in his arms, his little pink tongue lolling out the side of his mouth. Meredith bit her lip as a wave of sadness washed over her.

  “This is wonderful,” he said. “My daughter will be thrilled. She’s cried herself to sleep every night since he disappeared.” He gave the dog a gentle pat on the head. “I was gone on a business trip when it happened and wasn’t able to check the paper until I returned. And my father thought Snowflake had been stolen, so he didn’t check either.” He sent Meredith a warm smile. “Thank you, Ms. Ambrose for being willing to give him up. I can see you’ve taken excellent care of him.”

  She stretched her mouth upward, but her smile felt more like a grimace. “No problem. I’m glad your little girl will have him back.” She motioned toward the kennel and bag full of his food, leash, and toys.

  “I had signs posted in my neighborhood offering a reward—”

  Meredith shook her head. “No thank you. I'm just glad he's going back to his real home.”

  She gave Bitsy one last pat on the head before Clayton walked out the door. Waving while he drove away, she reminded herself this was for the best. A little girl’s world will be right again. I’m an adult, accustomed to change. I’m mature. I can deal with it.

  Fleetingly, she considered going to the mall and buying another puppy, but in the next moment, decided against it. Part of Bitsy’s appeal was that he’d come to her. At the time she’d considered him a blessing from the Lord. Now, he seemed to represent just another disappointment.

  ***

  The following day, Meredith floated on her back in deep end of the pool with her eyes closed. The soothing liquid lapped at her skin and eased the tension from her body. As her stress level dissipated, she was able to get a better perspective about Bitsy’s departure, along with the other difficulties in her life.

  I have my health, and a good job. All my physical needs have been met. I have no right to throw myself a pity party and I have no one to blame but myself for my hermit-like existence.

  She wondered what had changed. She’d always been a loner, even before her mother died. So what’s my problem? Meredith remembered it had been some time since she’d been in regular fellowship with other Christians. I’ll stop putting off church. Maybe there are meetings at a different times.

  What else could she change? Maybe night work had finally caught up with her. Would it make a difference if she worked days? Meredith decided to look into it.

  At least it’s a start. She floated for a while longer before beginning her laps.

  ***

  The following night at work, Meredith decided to take a peek at the hospital job board. Once she’d considered pursuing a more normal life, she hadn’t been able to get the idea out of her mind. After perusing openings within the hospital, she found an ad for a position as a Pediatric nurse, prepping juvenile patients and assisting in recovery from surgery.

  It was from six thirty in the morning to about three or four in the afternoon, Monday through Thursday, since that was when most of the surgeries were scheduled. The salary, though less than for a weekend float, was sufficient. She knew she could change her volunteer schedule at the Red Cross to Saturdays, so that wasn’t a hindrance. The notion appealed to her and after a quick prayer for guidance, she decided to apply.

  That done, Meredith had a quick bite in the cafeteria before heading to David’s new room. As expected, he was sleeping when she slipped into the darkened room. Meredith looked around in amazement at all the new floral arrangements crowding every available space. She peeked at the card of a particularly huge bouquet and saw it was from KVL News.

  “Merrie? Is that you?”

  She turned around and saw David making a groggy effort to sit up. She hurried to his side and placed a hand lightly on his chest. “David, please rest,” she said, using her most professional nurse’s tone.

  He sagged against his pillows and closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he gave her a tired smile. “Whatever they give me makes me dizzy if I move too fast.”

  “So don’t move so fast,” she teased. He looked so endearing, with his tousled hair and sleepy eyes. Steady, girl. “How are you feeling? I’m worried you’re not getting the rest you need with all these visitors you’ve been having.”

  He let out a big sigh. “Okay, I guess. I’m getting impatient being bound here this way. I have a job to start, that is unless KVL gets tired of waiting.”

  “They won’t. You’re probably a bigger draw now that you’ve been in an accident.”

  David gave her a lopsided grin. “You might be right. I can always count on you to keep my ego in check.”

  Meredith laughed softly. “Very funny, Steller. You know what I mean.” See, this isn’t so hard. She noticed his returning smile fade. A moment later, his eyelids began to droop. Meredith eased away from the bed, readying to leave.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Shhhh, David, you’re so tired you’re talking with your eyes closed. I’ll come back at a better time.”

  He reached out and grasped her hand with an intensity that surprised her. “Please stay.”

  “Okay, but just for a few minutes.” She sat in the chair next to the bed and tried to ignore the way her heart reacted at his words.

  “You didn’t visit me last night, Nurse Ambrose.”

  “I did, but you were asleep.”

  Something flickered across his features. “Were you going to wake me up tonight?”

  “Rest is more important.”

  “That’s my Merrie. Always so practical.” His voice just above a whisper, was touched with amusement.

  Meredith could see his meds were gaining the upper hand as his eyes closed and his breathing deepened. She watched him sleep for a few minutes, thankful he was doing so well. Looking down at her hand in his brought that familiar fluttering in her chest. She remembered admiring his heavily veined hands when she was a teen. Then again, there wasn’t much about him she hadn’t admired.

  She blew out a breath and tried to withdraw her hand, hoping not to wake him. Meredith was startled when his fingers wrapped more tightly around hers. Glancing at him, he appeared to be sound asleep. She gave her hand a little tug.

  “Where do you think you’re going?”

  “David,” she said, exasperated, “I need to get back to work. Besides, you’re starti
ng to cut off my circulation.”

  “Oh, sorry.” His grip relaxed, freeing her hand. “I guess now that I’ve seen you again, I don’t want to let you go.”

  Meredith caught her breath. But as he drifted back to sleep, she firmed her lips into a thin line, not daring to read anything into his words. He himself had said she was a familiar face. Leave it at that, Nurse Ambrose.

  ***

  When Meredith put her key in her front door lock the next morning, she heard a man’s voice. It took her a minute to realize it came from her answering machine. She burst through the door, into the kitchen, and grabbed the phone.

  “Hello?” she gasped.

  “Ms. Ambrose?”

  “Yes?”

  “This is Clay Roberts, Snowflake’s owner.”

  Meredith’s mind filled with unease. Has something happened to Bitsy?

  “You’ll never believe this,” he said, “but my father bought my daughter a new Westie. He didn’t know we had Snowflake back and surprised us with a visit last night with a new dog.”

  “Oh.” She set her purse on the counter.

  “Now we have two dogs. Predictably, Tiffany likes the new dog better since it’s quite a bit smaller, which, of course, pleased my father. Anyway, I was calling to ask if you would like Snowflake back. If you’re unable, I have several friends who’d be interested in having him.” He paused and lowered his voice. “I’m asking you first because you looked like you lost your best friend when you gave him up.”

  Meredith flushed at this, but couldn’t ignore her rising feeling of excitement at his words. “I’d love to have the dog, Mr. Roberts. I really do miss him.”

  She heard Clay breathe a sigh of relief. “Good. It’s been a zoo around here with the two of them and I know you took good care of Snowflake.”

  “He’s Bitsy to me.”

  Clay laughed. “That’s a good name for him considering all the times he’s nipped me.”

  Meredith found herself enjoying the sound of Clay’s slightly husky voice. “Would you like me to come pick him up?”

  “Actually, I’ll be in your part of town in an hour or so. Could I bring him by then?”

  “That would be great. I’ll look forward to seeing you.”

  “Bye.”

  When she hung up the phone, Meredith sat down with a dopey grin on her face. Bitsy’s coming home! She wanted to tell someone the happy news, but couldn’t think of anyone who’d be all that interested in hearing it.

  What about David? Glancing at the kitchen clock, she knew he’d be awake by now, having his breakfast. Meredith toyed with the phone receiver for a moment before replacing it. She had to face it. Clay Roberts hit the nail on the head. Right now, Bitsy was about the best friend she had.

  ***

  Meredith dried her hands on a tea towel and checked her appearance in the mirror when she heard a car pull into her driveway. A glimpse from the window told her Mr. Roberts had arrived. When she opened the front door, a white bolt of lightening zigzagged into her living room.

  Clayton followed Bitsy in, laughing when the puppy finally came to a stop, flopping onto his back on the sofa. “Well, it’s easy to see he feels comfortable here.”

  Meredith smiled. “Thanks for bringing him over. And I would like to pay you since I’m officially adopting him.”

  Clay shook his head. “Thanks for offering but it’s enough to know he’ll be in a good home.” He set the kennel and a paper bag down near the doorway. “Here’s all his canine paraphernalia.”

  Shifting from one foot to the other, Meredith tucked a curl behind her ear and noted a lack of a wedding ring on his hand. Remember your grand ideas about socializing? Why not start now? And with a real guy—not a dusty memory. “Can I get you anything to drink? I just made some fresh lemonade.”

  Clay glanced at his wristwatch. “Uh, sure. I have to meet my daughter for lunch in half an hour, but lemonade sounds great.”

  “Why don’t you come out back? I’ll bring the drinks out there.”

  Meredith showed him into her backyard and while he settled in a café chair, she poured lemonade into tall glasses. When she joined him at the little wrought iron table on the patio, he gave her a warm smile.

  “Ah, this looks wonderful, thanks.”

  Meredith sipped at her lemonade and watched while Bitsy chased a squirrel up an oak tree bordering her property with the neighbor’s yard.

  Clay set his glass down. “Your garden is beautiful. You must spend a lot of time here.”

  “Thank you, I do. Unfortunately, Bitsy has left his mark in a few places. I used to have a small azalea bush in that corner,” she said, motioning.

  Clay grinned. “I used to have several nice pairs of shoes. Snowflake, er…Bitsy was quite busy in that respect. And for any shoes I have left, Snowflake II is doing her best to finish them off.”

  “So that’s what you named the new puppy?”

  “My daughter Tiffany, who’s four, was still partial to it. They’re having a lot of fun together. I think having a dog is helping her deal with her grief…” His voice trailed away as he stared into the depths of his glass. “Her mother, my wife, died a year ago. Naturally Tiffany’s having a terrible time.”

  Meredith murmured condolences and couldn’t resist touching his hand. “And you are too,” she said softly, “but you feel you have to be strong for Tiffany, right?”

  Clay looked surprised. He gave her a sad smile. “That’s it exactly. I’m worried that if she sees me upset, she’ll start to become upset as well. I’ve tried to keep her life well ordered so she has a sense of security. Only in the last few months has she been able to be separated from me for any length of time. Since I own the company where I work, I was able to keep her with me. But now I’ve had to be gone a lot more on business. That’s why having the dog was so important.”

  “Speaking of your daughter, it’s almost noon,” she said gently. “I would hate to be responsible for you being late.”

  Clay drained his glass and stood. “Thank you, Ms. Ambrose—”

  “Meredith.”

  He smiled. “Then call me Clay. Thanks again for the lemonade…and for talking.”

  She gestured toward Bitsy. “Thanks for the dog. It’s a blessing to have him, I think.” She frowned when she saw him digging in a flower bed. “No, no, Bitsy!”

  “Trust me, you’re doing me a favor,” Clay said with a lopsided grin.

  Meredith walked with him to the front door. He stopped on her porch and shook her hand.

  “Maybe we’ll run into each other at the park one of these days. We’re there quite often.”

  “That would be nice.”

  After Clay was gone, Meredith went in search of Bitsy. When she saw him, she knelt in the grass and patted her hands together.

  “C’mere, you little scrapper.”

  The puppy obliged by racing into her arms and covering her with doggie kisses. Meredith rubbed her face in his silky fur and hugged him tight.

  Five

  At the staffing office that evening, Meredith was surprised to find she was assigned to David’s unit again. Erin must be off for the night. She couldn’t stop a wry smile from appearing on her face.

  After getting the reports of her patients from the day shift nurses, she began her assessment rounds. Tonight she had three women and three men patients. All were recovering from surgery for various ailments and as visiting hours came to a close, it was a time when patients had a tendency to become lonely. Without the distraction of friends and family, they were likely to experience more pain in the night hours. Meredith spent much of her shift handling requests for pain medication.

  As she took extra time to respond to patient calls, answer questions, or just hold someone’s hand, it reminded her of why she’d chosen to work nights in the first place. If I work days, I’ll lose a lot of this opportunity being snowed under more paperwork, doctor demands, and petty politics.

  Meredith had heard stories of what went on in some
of the huge hospitals, the stricter policies and rigid protocol. Choosing to work at a mid-sized hospital had been no mistake. The atmosphere tended to be more relaxed, along with the fact they didn’t deal with the highest-risk cases. Those patients were automatically routed to the bigger hospitals in Sacramento. Working nights in a smaller hospital was by design. Would I regret changing? Meredith thought about the day job she’d applied for. Maybe I was too rash. How can I offer the kind of care that’s important to me and have some semblance of a normal life?

  Since she’d already applied for the Peds position, she decided to rely on God’s direction by whether or not she actually got the job. Sighing, she stopped in front of David’s room, preparing for his assessment. He’d had visitors earlier and she'd made a note to return later.

  Meredith noticed, with some annoyance that her heart rate increased at the thought of seeing him again. Knowing she’d probably be able to linger in his room, she double-checked her appearance. Tonight, she had on blue pants, a nurse’s smock with a greenish-blue watercolor pattern, and white clogs. Not much I can do with the outfit. Of course, it shouldn’t matter anyway.

  She wished she’d thought to freshen her lip gloss as her hands reached up to check the blue silk ribbon she’d threaded through her French braid.

  Pathetic. Meredith rolled her eyes at her behavior and tapped on his door. After hearing David’s “come in”, she pushed the door open. Finding three men standing next to his bed, Meredith came to a stop.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had visitors. I can come back later.”

  “No! Stay, Merrie. I want to introduce you to my old teammates from when I played with the Colorado Rapids. They were in San Jose for a game and came to say hi.”