Lights and Shadows (Oregon In Love) Read online

  Perhaps the biggest difference, despite her small stature and fashionable appearance, was the fact that she had a kindness and calm elegance about her that the college student had lacked.

  Momentarily intrigued, he had to give himself a mental shake before turning his mind back to the task at hand. “Ms. Wilcox.”

  “Julia, please.”

  “Julia. I owe you an apology for my earlier behavior.”

  The softening of her features and warmth in her smile erased the next words from his mind. How could he have ever compared her to a deranged college co-ed? Marc felt his senses quicken as a spark of attraction flickered to life within him. He ruthlessly tamped it down. “There’s no excuse for the way I spoke to you and I can only hope you’ll be able to forgive me.”

  Humor glimmered in Julia’s eyes. “Apology accepted.”

  She held out her hand. Marc wrapped it in his own, amazed at its smallness.

  “I don’t suppose you’re going to tell me what happened?” she asked, her brows lifted.

  He gave her a rueful smile. “I don’t suppose I am.”

  “It was worth a try.”

  She gently tugged her hand free, making Marc realize once again, he’d held on too long.

  “Would you like to join us in the kitchen for a cup of tea?”

  He shook his head. “I need to leave early in the morning, so I’m going to turn in now.”

  Julia smiled. “Good night then. It was nice meeting you.”

  “You, too.”

  Marc remained in the living room until Julia returned to the kitchen, considering his unexpected reaction to her presence just now. He remembered during his last stay Sara had mentioned Julia's visit. That meant she wouldn’t be around long. Which also meant there was no point in exploring his feelings further on the subject.

  Resolving to put the fair Julia Wilcox from his mind, he turned and headed upstairs.

  “Well?” said Sara with avid interest when Julia reentered the kitchen. “Any explanations?”

  Julia shook her head and sat down at the table. She knew Sara would want to know every nuance of what had occurred with Marc, but she still felt muddled from the encounter herself.

  When he’d taken her hand in his and gazed at her so intently, for the barest moment, his warm grip had been a kind of lifeline. She’d been reluctant to let go, but the strength of her reaction to his touch unnerved her and she’d broken the connection.

  Julia had to admit she found Marc’s lean, dark looks attractive. His eyes were coal black and fringed with long lashes. His equally dark hair was a tad shaggy, and pushed back off his brow. His light olive skin tone gave him an exotic, eastern European appearance, though she hadn’t detected any accent.

  Bringing herself back to the present, Julia forced herself to answer Sara’s prodding questions in a monotone, hoping to bore her into changing the subject. In a matter of minutes, she’d managed to turn the conversation to talk of Sara’s baby. While Julia chatted of her excitement about becoming an aunt, not by the bat of an eye did she reveal the deep loneliness and discontent threatening to consume her.

  Chapter Three

  Late for work. Pushing the speed limit. The car hydroplaned on the slick road drenched from a sudden downpour. Headlights flashed from an oncoming vehicle. She wrenched the steering wheel to the right.

  Went too far.

  Over-compensated. A tree rose out of the darkness.

  Sirens.

  Julia reached out to shut off the shrieking alarm clock. She forced her eyes open, her heart pounding as if still caught up in the dream. After several moments, her breathing eased. Reality. I’m okay. It was just a dream. The events of the car accident continued to haunt her dreams, often leaving her more exhausted than rested in the mornings.

  The images slowly ebbed from her mind, leaving her feeling shaken and weak. She glanced at the clock. Six a.m. Got to get up. Time for exercises.

  Julia struggled to a sitting position, wincing at the pain in her head. It took her several more minutes to make it off the bed and into the bathroom. Good grief, I feel like an invalid!

  Ignoring the discomfort, Julia dressed in her workout clothes and began some light stretches. A sudden shaft of pain in her head forced her to slump onto the bed, gasping for breath. While she lay sprawled on the bedspread waiting for her spinning world to right itself again, she cursed the apparent cause of her condition.

  The accident two months earlier had left her unconscious for two days. Julia couldn't remember any of it, and only knew she hadn't been the same since. She reached up and touched the thin scars near her hairline. Despite a week in the hospital following the accident, and recovering at home for another ten days before heading back to work, she'd been unable to regain her physical strength. The time before the accident remained foggy.

  Did I feel this way before then? Was I this weak? Or am I just making excuses? She released a breath, no closer to answers than she had been any other day since. Her brother Brian had demanded she come to Oregon for a sabbatical and recuperation. Julia’s boss at the consulting firm where she worked in San Diego had also worried she’d returned to the office too soon. His strong suggestion she take time off carried much more weight. With pressure brought to bear from all sides, she’d eventually capitulated.

  Fat lot of good it’s doing me. Julia rubbed her forehead, closing her eyes. To top off the feeling of frailty, she’d been unable to shake off a black cloud of depression. Being around her family hadn’t helped as much as she’d hoped. All her prayers for relief seemed to go unanswered. She was fast losing hope she’d ever regain the full-tilt lifestyle she relished, along with the success and rewards that went with it.

  Julia eased herself up to a sitting position and expelled a ragged sigh. When her world came back into focus, she once again noticed how beautifully the little cottage had been decorated with its homespun wreaths and patchwork quilts. The cottage sat about thirty yards away from the main house. Sara had made it very comfortable, allowing Julia to stay here, instead of in one of the rooms in the B & B, where she’d have less privacy.

  Just the thought of Sara’s efforts to bless her made her eyes film over with tears. Julia swiped them away, impatient with her mawkishness. Despite the upheaval the accident caused in her life, she was determined to get a grip on herself, physically and emotionally.

  By sheer force of will if necessary.

  ***

  An hour later, Julia donned a rose-colored cashmere dress to dispel the coolness of the inclement Oregon weather. Emerging from the cottage, she noticed her brother’s truck in the driveway. Pleased he made it home sooner than expected, she went in the back door of the main house.

  Julia expected there to be activity in the kitchen since Marc was staying in one of the rooms upstairs. But the gleaming kitchen was quiet and clean, with no evidence of breakfast.

  She poured herself a glass of water and looked out the window to the blue haze of mountains beyond. She heard a rumble of masculine laughter from Brian and Sara’s private quarters. Sipping her water, she wondered if she should peek into the living room. She might catch a glimpse of Marc Dorin, depending on when he left.

  While Julia chafed at the idea of being paired up with someone—which was obviously Sara’s plan—she had to admit she found him intriguing. When they’d talked the evening before, she noticed his dark eyes were the kind that often revealed little of the person’s inner thoughts. But she sensed no guile in them. And he didn’t treat her with the flirtatious glances or mannerisms she’d come to expect from men. Marc seemed straightforward and even a little bit shy, something which appealed to her.

  He was handsome with his unusual coloring, but Julia knew better than to let herself get carried away by that alone. She wasn’t looking for a man. She could appreciate him from a distance, but that was as far as it went.

  Now the challenge would be to curtail any attempts Sara had of matchmaking—but in such a way to avoid hurting her feelings. Peop
le happy and in love often felt the need for everyone else around them to be in the same situation—a forgivable but annoying problem.

  The door that led to Brian and Sara’s quarters opened and the couple came into the kitchen.

  “Good morning,” Julia said. “I thought you were supposed to be out of town.”

  Brian Farris, a taller, masculine version of herself, stooped down to kiss her cheek. “Don’t sound so disappointed, sis. I finished earlier than expected. But it’s back to the grindstone today.”

  Sara let out a cavernous yawn. “I don’t know how you two are so chipper in the mornings.”

  “I tumble out of bed looking this good,” said Brian. “It takes Julia quite a bit longer, of course, but she tries.”

  Julia raised a brow and refilled her water glass while Brian grabbed a muffin from the refrigerator.

  Sara kissed him goodbye as he went out the door. Julia saw the way Sara watched him through the kitchen window. When she turned back to Julia, her eyes were luminous and her face, flushed.

  “I sure am partial to that brother of yours,” she said, a sheepish grin on her face.

  Julia experienced a stabbing pain somewhere near the region of her heart. While thrilled with her brother’s marriage, it also underlined her own singleness. A state with which I'm quite content. “That’s good to know, since you married him and all,” Julia said, forcing a note of teasing into her voice. “Where is he working today?”

  “He’s going to look at a job in a town about twenty miles from here. He shouldn’t be gone too long.”

  “Well, are you hungry? I see breakfast hasn’t been started.”

  “I’m starved.”

  “Do you like crêpes?”

  “Sure, but you don’t need to cook for me. I’m supposed to be doing that for you. You’re the guest. Besides, Brian says you still haven’t really recovered from the car accident.”

  Brothers and their big mouths. Julia waved her to the table. “He’s a worrywart. Go sit down. Cooking is a treat. I don’t always have time for it at home.”

  Sara settled at the kitchen table. “Let me guess, for breakfast, lunch and dinner, you just pick up the phone and dial.”

  Julia put a crêpe pan on the gas range. “You’re catching on. But way, way back, I wanted to become a chef and went to a cooking school, so I truly do love to cook.”

  “Why didn’t you stay with it?”

  Julia shrugged, uncomfortable with trips down memory lane. “I don’t know. It was during a restless time in my life. I guess I was just trying to figure out where I fit.”

  “So you got into consulting after that?” Sara said, rubbing her belly.

  “Actually, I did some catering and was a wedding consultant for a time.”

  “Sounds like you finally found your niche in what you’re doing now. Brian said you’ve been with your firm for several years.”

  Glad her back was to her sister-in-law, Julia thought back to all her jobs. Working with brides eventually depressed her. Cooking made her realize she had no family of her own to prepare meals for. Consulting made her feel needed. She could solve problems, and often her solutions brought improvement. I can’t say that about other areas of my life.

  “Ten years ago, one of the brides I worked with was pleased with my effort and suggested I talk to her husband who ran a professional consulting firm. I took her advice and got the job. And starting at the bottom, I've enjoyed each new challenge. Eventually, I may look into starting my own consulting business.” She winced at her word choices. Goodness, do I have to sound like a brochure?

  When Sara didn’t respond, Julia felt relieved her explanation seemed to satisfy her. She cracked an egg into a bowl and cleared her throat. “Has Mr. Dorin eaten already?”

  “Brian said he left about six this morning. Last night I packed a breakfast bag for him so he wouldn’t leave hungry. Unfortunately, he doesn’t stop in on his way home from the mountains, so we may not see him again for a while.”

  Julia glanced at her sister-in-law, stifling a sliver of disappointment.

  Sara leaned forward and rested her chin in her hands. “He’s cute, huh?”

  “I thought married women weren’t supposed to notice things like that.”

  Sara smiled. “A purely aesthetic observation, I assure you.”

  Julia opened the refrigerator door. “Do you want a fruit compote with your crêpes?”

  “Whatever’s easier. He’s single, too, don’t forget.”

  “Who?”

  “Marc Dorin, that’s who. Don’t tell me you’re not interested.”

  She placed the ingredients on the counter and shut the refrigerator door. “I’m not.”

  “Why?”

  Julia rearranged items on the counter. “He’s a baby for one thing. I’m in my thirties and he’s in his twenties, or so you said.”

  Sara sputtered. “He’s turning twenty-nine this year and you’re only thirty-one. Sheesh! Besides, there’s six years between Brian and me.”

  “That’s different.”

  “Now you're just being silly.” Her sister-in-law drummed her fingers on the tabletop. “I have a feeling age has little to do with this. So you’re truly not interested?”

  “Nope.” Julia poured the crêpe batter into the hot pan and watched it cook. “This really would be better if the batter could’ve sat for a few hours.” A few seconds later, she turned the crêpe over. When two were complete, she arranged them on a plate, filled each with a ricotta cheese mixture and topped them with cherry compote. After finishing the plate with a decorative red drizzle, she sprinkled the crepes with powdered sugar and set the plate in front of Sara.

  “Wow, very pretty.” She picked up her fork. “None for you?”

  Julia joined her at the table. “I don’t eat breakfast.”

  Sara took a bite and sighed. “This is heavenly. I’m used to eating Cheerios every morning.”

  “I’m glad you like it.”

  “I should hire you to cook for our guests.”

  “Actually, I had planned on suggesting it myself.”

  Sara shook her head. “You’re here for a break. Besides, I was just joking. Right now we’re only averaging about three guests a week, so I can handle it.”

  Julia smiled and leaned forward. “You’re pregnant and shouldn’t be running around so much. I have nothing to do. As a matter of fact, I’m a bit at loose ends—”

  “You’ve only been here four days! And you’ve already cleaned the house from top to bottom twice!”

  “I guess I’m not used to having so much time on my hands. But really, cooking is such a treat for me. It would be a great diversion. Please?”

  “Brian has already mentioned he would like to hire help for the last couple months of my pregnancy, but I know he would refuse to hire you.”

  Julia allowed herself a smug smile. “I can handle my brother.”

  Sara shook her head and took another bite. A fat red cherry fell off her fork and landed on the white fabric of the blouse stretched over her tummy. “Good grief! What a mess!”

  Julia jumped up to get a napkin, but even after careful dabbing, a bright red stain remained on the fabric.

  “Great. Another maternity top ruined. I’ve only got three left and I can’t stand them. One’s a sailor design and the other two have giant floppy bows on the front. They’re hideous!”

  Julia laughed at her sister-in-law’s disgruntled expression. “Do you have any plans for the day?”

  Sara curled a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “I have to go into town later for groceries. Why?”

  She waggled her eyebrows. “How do you feel about making a detour to the nearest mall?”

  “For some new maternity clothes?”

  “Yes,” Julia replied, glancing out the kitchen window. “Look outside. It’s a shopper’s sky.”

  Sara giggled. “You tell that by looking outside, hmm?”

  “Okay, any day is a shopping day. Now hurry and eat so we c
an go!”

  ***

  After breakfast, Julia followed Sara out into the driveway. The sun peeked from behind the clouds as they climbed into Sara’s ‘68 blue Mustang, which Julia insisted on driving.

  “This looks familiar,” she said, snapping her seatbelt. “Brian had one similar to it in California.”

  Sara nodded. “He told me about his ‘baby’. When we met, I had an old Chevy pickup that was prone to die, so when he found this for sale, he said if I insisted on driving something old, it might as well have a little class.”

  “Men and cars,” Julia said with a laugh, pulling out onto the road.

  “They say you can tell a lot about a man by the car he drives. What kind of man would you say drives a newer black four-wheel-drive pickup?”

  Julia gripped the steering wheel and stepped on the gas. The Mustang roared in response as they pulled out onto the road. She let out a breath. “Look, I appreciate what you’re attempting, but I have to discourage you in the strongest of terms. I’m sure Mr. Dorin is a wonderful person—”

  “And good looking, employed, and a Christian,” Sara said, ticking each item off on her fingers. “They don’t come a dime a dozen you know.”

  “But,” Julia continued firmly, “I’m not interested in any kind of dalliance, even if he were so inclined.”

  “Not even something serious?”

  “Especially not a serious relationship. You wouldn’t be the first to try to set me up, so I’ll have to ask you to channel your matchmaking energies toward someone more promising.”

  “But don’t you want to fall in love and get married?”

  Julia stared at the winding road before her until she could speak without a wobble in her voice. “I’ve been through that…and it’s not something I want to repeat.”

  Sara touched her arm. “I’m so sorry. I don’t seem to know when to stop. Please forgive me?”

  Julia forced a reassuring smile to her lips. “It’s all right. I know you just want everyone to be as happy as you are, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But I have a full life and I’m content with where I am right now.”